Macy’s Mixed Up Day; Uber Pumped for Some IPO Magic; Madoff Victims Rejoice. Well, Maybe Not.

It could have been worse…

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There’s good news. And there’s bad news. Well, for Macy’s anyway. So let’s start with the bad because, why not. The department store chain just released its third-quarter earnings and very unhappily reported that comparable same-store sales fell 3.6%. That’s not even the bad part. What’s worse is that analysts expected those sales to fall, but only by 2.6%. This latest quarter marks Macy’s 12th consecutive quarter of straight declines and these dismal results come smack in the middle of Macy’s turnaround plan called “North Star.” To be fair, however, it was expected that this turnaround plan wasn’t going to change numbers overnight. As for the good news, Macy’s profit rate went up, helped by cost-cutting measures and store closures. That helped the retailer take in $36 million, almost double what it took in last year at this time. Online sales also went up by so much, that it almost took the sting out of the fall in comparable sales. Almost. So naturally, shares went up today, as well. A smidge. But those shares were at the highest point they had been in nine months. Too bad, though, they are still down more than 50% in the last twelve months.

IPWhoa!

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Uber is almost ready to make its big Wall Street debut.  Almost. The company’s new CEO, Dara Khosrowshahi, wants to make that happen by 2019. With a $70 billion valuation, Uber is the most highly-valued private company in the world. According to Khosrowshahi, “We have all of the disadvantages of being a public company, as far as the spotlight on us, without any of the advantages of being a public company.” Even Travis Kalanick, the ousted CEO but current board member, agrees. As for Kalanick, he’s not really gone and you can bet he won’t be forgotten. Not if he can help it anyway. IPO’s weren’t the only thing Khosrowshahi’s been discussing lately. Earlier this week, the CEO unveiled his own “cultural norms” for the company, and one of them goes a little something like this: “We do the right thing. Period.” A far cry from the climate under Kalanick that had a former employee write a scathing blog post detailing allegations of sexual harassment.  Which brings us to the much-discussed Soft Bank deal, where Uber is poised to give a very hefty 20% stake to the Japanese bank. For the right price, of course. Khosrowshahi insists the deal is really, truly going to happen. For real. It. Will. Happen. The primary issue being the price, because isn’t it always?

It’s about time…

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Thousands of victims of Ponzi Schemer Bernie Madoff are set to receive over $770 million in compesation for the money they lost. The $770 million is part of a $4 billion fund set up to compensate victims. And sure, that’s good news. Except for the fact that it took nine years to happen and much of those funds will only cover about 25% of the losses.  But guess what? It still counts as “the largest restoration of forfeited property in history.” Close to 25,000 checks will be mailed to victims, ranging from institutions to individuals in 49 states and 119 countries.  If you recall, Bernie Madoff was accused and found guilty of perpetrating a $65 billion Ponzi scheme. These days, the schemer of the century is chillaxin’ in Club Fed for the next 150 years.

Alphabet Takes on Some Heavy Lyfting; Crash and Burn: Black Monday Crash-iversary Turns 30; Blue Apron Puts Employees on the Chopping Block

 

Car-ma?

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Uber? What’s Uber? I can tell you what Uber isn’t. It isn’t $1 billion more valuable. But you know who is? Its rival Lyft, which just received a very hefty sum of money from Google’s parent company, Alphabet, following a very recent financing round that brings its total valuation to $11 billion. CapitalG, an Alphabet growth investment fund, will now get a seat on the board and an even cushier relationship with the ride-sharing company.  Incidentally, Alphabet is also connected to Uber. However, that relationship went south when Uber went ahead and started developing autonomous cars that compete directly with Alphabet’s Waymo autonomous-driving technology. Naturally, that didn’t sit well with Alphabet. If you recall, and it’s totes okay if you don’t, Alphabet then sued Uber, alleging the beleaguered ride-sharing company committed trade secret theft. Some analysts believe that this little infusion from Alphabet is the company’s way of hitting back at Uber. Seems legit.  In any case, it appears an IPO may be on the horizon for Lyft and if Alphabet’s throwing money at it, it might turn out to be a stock worth watching.

Unhappy anniversary…

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Today’s date marks an anniversary many would like to forget: The stock market crash of 1987, aka, Black Monday. It was exactly 30 years ago today that the Dow Jones Industrial Average (DJIA) crashed 508 points to a smidge past 1700. The index tanked by 22% and the shockwaves rippled all over the world. It was an even bigger one day drop than the stock market crash of 1929.  But miraculously, the market recovered. Well, maybe not for everyone.  In any case, this week (of all weeks), that very same index just hit a new record, breaking the 23,000 mark. To put it in perspective, if the DJIA crashed by 22% today, it would need to lose almost 6,000 points – heaven forbid! Poo poo poo.  Some market experts warn that we could experience another disastrous drop. However, following the nightmare of Black Monday, certain safeguards, dubbed “circuit breakers,” were put into place that basically – and very conveniently – shut down the market after major drops. This prevents trading and sell-offs that could cause further damage. And basically, now if the S&P 500 falls either 7%, 13% or 20%, depending on certain factors, market trading is halted automatically. You are now free to breathe a sigh of relief.

Stick a fork in me…

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Nothing spells trouble like having to cut your workforce just four months after going public. Which brings us to Blue Apron, purveyor of fine meal-kits, which just found itself having to do just that. The fact is, there’s a lot of competition sprouting everywhere, from Amazon and its Whole Foods acquisition to Albertsons picking up the company Plated in order to sell their kits at the grocery chain’s 2000+ locations. For Blue Apron, it meant having to slash 6% of its workforce which amounts to about 300 employees. The stock is trading today at around $5.20 a share, down almost 50% from its IPO price back in June.

Schadenfraud Anyone? Forbes Unveils its Latest Top 400; Can’t Stop Netflix; Venmo’s the New Way to Go. At Least According to Paypal

That’s a whole lotta money…

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Forbes has unveiled its latest list. This time it’s the top 400 richest Americans for 2017 and there are very few surprises in store. Bill Gates and his $89 billion net worth takes the top spot, followed by Amazon’s Jeff Bezos and everyone’s favorite Omaha Oracle, Warren Buffett.  Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg sits pretty in fourth place. The first time we finally see a woman on the list is at spot number 13 and it’s occupied by Alice Walton of the illustrious Walmart clan. There are 22 newbies on the list and some of them are even self-made billionaires, including Netflix CEO Reed Hastings who comes in at number 359. He had a good year and his company had a great quarter. But we’ll get to that one in a bit. Former Uber CEO Travis Kalanick comes in at number 115, despite being out of his CEO job, while beloved Star Wars creator George Lucas gets spot 118. As for President Trump, he did make the list, coming in at a less than impressive (for him) ranking of 248.  He shares the spot with 15 other people including Snapchat founder Evan Spiegel. Their fortunes are valued at $3.1 billion, a figure the President will probably dispute. It’s a steep drop for the President, whose 2016 ranking had him at the 156th spot. But I guess that’s what happens when your portfolio loses $600 million. I wonder who he’s going to blame for that one?

Wall Street ❤️ Netflix…

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The best way to bring Wall Street to its finicky knees is to crush its expectations. And Netflix did just that. First, the video streaming company laughed in the face of analysts’ projections for subscriber growth. For Netflix that was a 5.3 million increase, far from the modest forecast of 4.5 million new subscribers. A large percentage of those new subscribers came from outside the U.S. Netflix now boasts 109 million subscribers and I’m guessing you must be one of them, right? As for the next quarter, the company expects to add 6.3 million subscribers. Revenue for the company was $2.99 billion, again beating projections of $2.97 billion.  However, at first glance, Netflix’s profit was not so impressive. But that’s only because the company is throwing down serious cash for producing its own shows. And if you’ve ever seen “Orange is the New Black” or “House of Cards” then you’d probably agree that it’s money well spent.  So what does this all mean for you, the Netflix connoisseur/viewer, who obsessively waits for new seasons of your beloved shows to be unleashed? Well, you can probably expect an increase in your subscription plans but hey, that’s the price you gotta pay if you want to keep watching new seasons of “Stranger Things,” right?

Going half-sies…

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If you haven’t signed up for Venmo yet, now might be a good time to start. The company just announced that users can now use the app to make mobile online purchases from over 2 million retailers including Forever 21 and Foot Locker.  But what’s so darn cute about Venmo is a feature that gives you the option to split a purchase with a friend. Or even an acquaintance, I suppose. Which is so great when you go out for lunch and can’t be bothered to do the math at the table or when you just want to pay the rent down the middle. And, you can even share status updates about the purchase. How nifty. Especially if you’re a millennial. Did I mention that Paypal is Venmo’s parent company? Well, it is. And pretty much anywhere you’re able to use PayPal, you can now use Venmo there as well. Just think of all the Lululemon merchandise you can purchase with all your besties.

 

 

 

Travis Kalanick’s Not-So-Fond Farewell; It’s Bottoms Up for George Clooney; Glassdoor Drops Another List and You Better Hope Your Boss is on it

Goodbye and farewell…

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Looks like Travis Kalanick’s “leave of absence” is now a permanent one as he finally took the hint from investors and officially resigned as Uber’s CEO. But not before the aforementioned investors placed a lot of pressure on the embattled CEO to step down. And who can blame the investors. Scandal after ugly scandal emerged from the $68 billion, privately held company and it seemed as if Kalanick wasn’t up to snuff when it came to dealing with them.  In an email to employees, Kalanick talked about his love for Uber and decided to step down “so that Uber can go back to building rather than be distracted with another fight.” How very gallant of him. While Kalanick still remains on the board of Uber, the business is now being run by fourteen people who once upon a time reported to him. Talk about irony.

Aye tequila!

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Some guys have all the luck and George Clooney is one of them. If you think he’s just an actor with a pretty face then you are so very wrong. Turns out the Hollywood hunk also has his own tequila brand –  along with two other partners – called Casamigos, which was just bought for $1 billion by liquor company giant Diageo. The name Diageo might not ring a bell for you, but the name Smirnoff should, and that is just one of the many notable brands that belongs to the Diageo family. Curious who George’s other partners are? Mr. Cindy Crawford, aka Rande Gerber and Mike Meldman. Annoyingly enough, Clooney and Gerber were just trying to come up with their very own “house” tequila for the properties they own in Cabo San Lucas.  But a very lucrative opportunity knocked that had them expanding the brand beyond Cabo, and just last year 120,000 cases of the stuff was shipped out. This year the company expects that number to climb to 170,000. And with a price tag between $45 to $55 a bottle, Clooney and company get to live large without having to rely on other their other talents, including acting and such. As for Diageo, you can bet that this acquisition had less to do with Clooney’s movie star charm and more to do with the fact that tequila volume in the U.S. more than doubled from 2002 to 2015.

There’s a list for that too…

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Glassdoor has regaled us with yet another list. This time it’s to let us know who the top CEO’s in the world are, according to employees And you can bet Travis Kalanick did not make the cut. The Clorox Company’s Benno Dorer takes the top spot. What? Were you expecting a tech CEO? Well too bad because Dorer earned a 99% approval rating from his employees.  Another name from the list you might recognize is Elon Musk who takes the eighth spot. Interestingly enough, his 98% employee approval rating came not from Tesla, but his other company, SpaceX. Wonder what that’s about. Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg makes it onto the list at number ten, also with a 98% approval rating. But sadly that’s a sharp drop from his number four spot in 2016. Google’s Sundar Pichai grabs the 17th spot while LinkedIn’s Jeff Weiner comes in at number 35. The biggest bummer on the list just might be Apple’s Tim Cook. Last year he held the number eight spot, but this year he drops to spot number 53. In all fairness, however, he still scored a 93% approval rating.

 

That’s All Folks: Yahoo Rides Off Into the Sunset; Uber Drama; Trump’s Attempts at Flattery; It’s Raining Tacos and Cheesecake Today

And that’s a wrap…

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Sometimes goodbyes are hard and sometimes goodbyes are worth $23 million. At least that’s the case for Marissa Mayer, who will be collecting that much cash now that Verizon’s $4.5 billion acquisition of Yahoo is a done deal. Gosh, imagine what she’d be collecting if she were asked to stay on board. In any case, Yahoo will now melt into the AOL vortex and together they will morph in a new entity profoundly named Oath. However, once that happens, over 2,000 employees can expect to kiss their jobs goodbye. The last itty bitty remaining pieces of Yahoo will be named Altaba in homage to the fact that it is primarily a holding company for Yahoo’s sizable stake in the Chinese e-commerce site Alibaba.

Other highlights from today…

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  • It’s official: Uber CEO Travis Kalanick needs to compose his out-of-office reply. A management group will be established to run the show in his absence and when he returns he’ll be stripped of some of his duties. As for his return date, that is yet to be determined. It appears that he wont be missed that much. In the meantime, Uber now needs to come up with an effective system to tackle HR complaints. That might take awhile seeing as how the company is pretty much starting from scratch in that area.
  • In a meeting with Federal Reserve Chair Janet Yellen, President Trump said to her that he thinks she’s a “low-interest person” like himself. Which is ironic since during his campaign he had plenty of criticism for the Fed because it kept those rates low. He also said he “likes her” and “respects her” which could mean anything and nothing when you’re President Donald Trump. Naturally, the Fed declined to comment, all while rumors swirl that it is expected to raise short-term interest rates for the fourth time in two years.
  • Go out and get yourself a free taco today. A Doritos Locos Taco, to be more specific. It’s on the house. At least at Taco Bell. The fast-food chain is being generous because the Golden State Warriors “stole” game 3 from the Cleveland Cavs. Naturally, it’s all part of a promotion, in this case the one that goes “Steal a Game, Steal a Taco.” Whatever. It’s free food.
  • Shares of Cheesecake Factory took a beating today because of Mother Nature. No, really. Apparently, because of some bad weather, customers near locations in the East and Midwest couldn’t enjoy enough “patio time” whilst eating copious amounts of cheesecake, thereby negatively affecting sales. And just like you, the analysts didn’t buy that excuse either.

Uber Drama Revs Up; Gymboree’s Next Chapter in Life: 11; Aldi Ready to Feed You For Less. Much Less

These are the days of Uber’s life…

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The Silicon Valley soap opera we call Uber is making awkward, unpleasant headlines again. This time it’s because the rumor mill is swirling with talk that Uber CEO, Travis Kalanick, is about to take a leave of absence. Which begs the question about how this new development will affect Uber, if at all. Then we turn our attention to the now ex-number two honcho at the ride-sharing company, Emil Michael, who has left the Uber building. It’s doubtful he’ll be missed that much since he was apparently pressured to step down. In fact, Kalanick was advised to let Michael go earlier this year, however he declined to entertain that suggestion – a decision that eventually bit him in his corporate butt. Perhaps had Kalanick let Michael go when asked to do so, he might not find himself figuring out how to spend all his newfound free time. All this unpleasantness – well for Kalanick and Michael, anyway – ensued following a meeting with Eric Holder’s law firm. You remember him, dontcha? He’s the former U.S. Attorney General and if he’s got some recommendations, it’s prudent to follow them. Holder’s firm was retained by Uber to conduct internal investigations following accusations of sexual harassment and gender bias. The findings, his firm reported, were “ugly.” That doesn’t bode well for the world’s most valuable privately held company, now does it?

Another one bites the dust…

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Today’s Chapter 11 bankruptcy filing is brought to you by Gymboree, the children’s clothing store chain which can be found in just about any mall in the United States. Well, maybe not for much longer. The company still plans to remain in business, it’s just going to be shuttering anywhere from 375 to 450 of its stores. But rest assured, if you’re a frequent patron of the chain, there will still be well over 800 stores left from which to do your kids’ clothes shopping. If you are at all shocked about the store closures and bankruptcy filing, then clearly you aren’t one of the many creditors Gymboree refused to pay in the last few months. With increasing online competition and a major slowdown in mall traffic, it’s no wonder Gymboree just couldn’t make bank. The company is staring down the wrong end of $1.4 billion worth of debt and hopes to nail down a plan to help it shed about $1 billion of it.  The kicker, though, is that the company is still profitable, a bonus that a lot of analysts think will help propel Gymboree towards a bright, shinier fiscally nourishing future.

Grab your cart…

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Grocery chain Aldi has got some lofty goals. And if you’re thinking you’ve never heard of the chain, then just wait. The company just announced a $3.4 billion plan to make sure you do. Aldi has set its grocer sights on becoming the third largest grocery chain behind Kroger and Walmart. The grocery store chain currently boasts 1,600 locations from which to purchase your groceries, but by 2022, it expects to have 2,200 stores gracing the country.  Some 1,300 of its pre-existing stores are also being treated to a $1.6 billion remodel. And who doesn’t love a little remodel? However, the biggest thrill of all is that Aldi is going to attempt to price its merchandise over 20% lower than its rivals while adding 25,000 jobs in the process. If that doesn’t sound appetizing, the I don’t know what does.

Amazon’s Kindness Almost Knows No Bounds; Uber Cleans House; Crew-Cut: CEO Drexel Waves a Preppy Goodbye

Yep, they went there…

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It’s the American Dream. Well, for Amazon anyway. Rather than worry about disenfranchising an entire portion of the population that can’t comfortably afford Amazon’s Prime subscription service, the e-commerce giant is now offering this highly esteemed membership privilege for a 50% discount to those on government assistance. All it takes is a valid Electronic Benefits Transfer card. Because why should the fact that someone is receiving government assistance stand in the way of their Amazon shopping experience, right? It is incredibly thoughtful of Amazon to think of those less fortunate by reducing the cost of subscription for them. However, if it were not to Amazon’s fiscal advantage, then this latest initiative might not have been unveiled. That fiscal advantage comes in the form of a competitive edge over Walmart, whose low prices have attracted the very countless customers that Amazon is trying to woo with this new incentive. After all, studies have shown that once customers sign up for Prime status, they tend to beef up their orders. So, we’re talking a win-win for Amazon. And a lose for Walmart.

Job openings…

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Looks like karma may finally be catching up with some folks over at Uber, as the ride-sharing company just fired 20 employees over sexual harassment claims. Apparently 215 claims were leveled against these 20 individuals, which sort of begs the question: Was there anybody left at Uber who didn’t get sexually harassed? The investigation was conducted by law firm Perkins Coie and disturbingly enough, it found that no action was even taken in 100 of those claims. Oh, and there are still even more claims being investigated.  In addition to the 20 terminated fiends, seven other employees received written warnings, while 31 more employees need to get “special training” to teach them how not to harass people and behave like stupid, thoughtless destructive pieces of trash. CEO Travis Kalanick launched the investigation back in February after a former Uber employee named Susan Fowler wrote in a blog post about her personal experiences of sexual harassment and gender bias at the company. However, when asked about the issue back in May, Uber’s head of HR, Liane Hornsey, said it wasn’t an issue that had come up. Especially if you had your head firmly entrenched in the sand, of course.

And that’s a wrap…

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After 14 years, J. Crew’s Mickey Drexler is calling it quits and handing over the reins to West Elm CEO James Brett. While Drexler may be out as CEO, he’ll still stay on as Chairman. And why not? After all, he owns 10% of the preppy apparel company. Drexel decided to step down from his role after declining sales – 6% in just the last year – led to a whole bunch of other problems including restructuring, layoffs and the departure of its pseudo-celebrity, high-profile creative director, Jenna Lyons. Not that any of that was entirely Drexel’s fault. Only a bit of it, some might argue. Because apparently the problems and challenges he faced were industry wide for apparel companies in general, as so many of them continue to struggle to get a leg up on fast-fashion, affordable competitors like Zara and H&M.

 

Lyft and Waymo = Carpool; Bud Spending $2 billion to Up Its Game; AIG Bets Big on Latest CEO

Self-less…

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In case you were having trouble envisioning a world with driverless cars, you might want to check out Alphabet Inc.’s company Waymo. Waymo, a self-driving car company,  has just teamed up with Lyft, and that should be enough to make Uber more than a little nervous. You might be wondering why a company owned by Google even needs a much smaller company like Lyft for a partnership. But believe it or not, there’s a little quid pro quo going on because since Lyft has the dubious distinction of being the second largest ride service company, it will allow Waymo’s technology to reach even more people than without it. Isn’t that just beautiful? Uber, on the other hand, is looking to develop driverless technology on its own. If you recall, Waymo sued Uber back in February, alleging that Uber stole Waymo’s self-driving technology to build its own fleet.  But with the way things are going for Uber lately, it might be more prudent for the embattled ride-sharing company to focus on its current crop of legal and publicity challenges instead of driverless cars. For the time being anyway.  By the way, Lyft’s deal with Waymo is not exclusive. Which is super important considering that GM is a big Lyft investor and already has its own partnership in place to develop self-driving cars. It’s like legit double-dipping and everybody wins. In fact, come 2018, Lyft and GM will be set to deploy and test thousands of self-driving cars. Yikes!

Competitive beer…

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It might be hard to believe but the King of Beers is not looked upon as the royalty it once was. And so, its parent company Anheuser-Busch InBev NV is plunking down $2 billion to try and fix that issue. The plan is to make a substantial, lucrative foray into new categories, while at the same time boosting its flagship brands which have been staring down the wrong end of increased competition.  The money will be spent over the next four years, using approximately $500 million per year. In case you were thinking that $2 billion seems like an awfully bloated  – no pun intended – number to spend on improving a beer brand, consider that beer is a more than $107 billion industry and no self-respecting beer company wants to lose ground in a market like that.  And make no mistake, beer has been losing ground lately with not as much of it being consumed like in years past. Hard to believe. I know, but various types of other alcoholic beverages have been flooding the market in recent years and consumers are digging them. Which leaves companies like Anheuser-Busch scrambling to reclaim its foamy territory.

No pressure or anything…

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Maybe the seventh time’s a charm for AIG, which just announced it’s coughing up $12 million – and then some – to pay its newest CEO, Brain Duperreault. By “then some” I refer to an additional 1.5 million stock options and a $16 million pay package all based on the hope that Duperreault will finally be the one to turn AIG around. Did you catch that? He’s getting all that and he hasn’t sat at his new desk yet. The last CEO, Peter Hancock, left in March because he wasn’t feeling the love, or rather investor support, including from the one and only Carl Icahn. But Brian Deperreault just might have what AIG’s been looking for all these years, well at least since 2005. He’s no stranger to AIG, having worked there as a deputy way back when. He’s coming over from Hamilton Insurance, and before that he was at Marsh & McClennan Cos. earning solid reputations at both firms. As for his first order of business: achieve stability in a company that has seen too many high-level departures, four straight quarters of losses and high claims costs. Good luck with that one, Mr. Duperreault. You’re gonna need it.

Amazon Lands Itself in the Middle East; Price of New Skin Drug Will Make Your Skin Crawl; Spoiler Alert: Uber’s Not So Diverse

Just Souq it up…

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In case you were wondering what Amazon’s been up to lately, here’s a hint: It’s got nothing to do with drones. Sort of. Instead, the online marketplace just agreed to scoop up Souq.com, the Dubai-based Amazon of the Middle East, and apparently the largest online retailer in the region. While we don’t know the exact numbers involved in the deal, we do know that 1.) There was one other bid by a billionaire from Dubai and 2.) It’s apparently the biggest tech merger & acquisition in the Arab world. Ever. At least according to somebody at Goldman Sachs. But I guess Goldman Sachs would know something like that. Rumor has it that although the Dubai billionaire, Mohamed Alabbar, counter-offered $800 million for the company, Amazon will be paying even less. What’s super-interesting about that factoid is that last year Souq.com was valued at around a billion following a funding round.

What a bargain…

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The good news is that the FDA actually approved a new treatment for severe eczema. The bad news is that it costs $37,000 a year to get it. But for some it might be worth every penny considering that one-third to two-thirds of the patients who used the drug actually regained clear or almost-clear skin.  Manufactured by Frace’s Sanofi SA and New York’s Regeneron Pharmaceuticals, the just approved drug, called Dupixent, is actually injected under the skin every two weeks, unlike previous eczema treatments, which are typically topical and often involve steroids and antihistamines. The injection apparently contains an antibody that does something to basically scare off the skin condition condition. Sort of. In any case, while $37,000 seems like a ridiculous amount of money to pay – because it is – consider that it’s still lower than Humira and Enbrel, drugs that also treat skin ailments. However, Wall Street didn’t look at it that way and instead sent shares of Regeneron down upon news of the five-figure price tag.

 

Well, what did you expect?

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Uber finally finally released its very first diversity report following a slew of issues, a ton of criticism, not to mention claims of sexual discrimination. But the only surprising thing about the report is that there weren’t any.  Surprises, that is. Sure the company employees minority groups. Unfortunately, those groups aren’t as well-represented at the top. The ride-hailing app employs about 12,000 people globally, and about 64% of them are males. Of that 12,000 figure, 36% are women and 22% of those women hold higher-level positions, while 15% of them work in the company’s tech areas. In the U.S., however, the numbers are almost embarrassing as blacks hold just 2.3% of leadership roles, while Hispanics represent .8% of those positions  – just not on the technical side.  And just to be clear, those percentages are not exclusive to Uber, but rather are fairly representative of Silicon Valley tech companies. Except now Uber pledged to throw $3 million at the problem in order to find solutions to make those numbers...better.

Bill Gates Is So Not Into President’s Budget Blueprint; Does Uber Have Some High-Level Job Openings?

Just letting you know…

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Chances are if Bill Gates is not into your budget blueprint, then maybe it’s worth it to make a few (hundred-billion dollar) changes to it.  Which explains one of the reasons why the world’s richest man is in DC today, to have a little chat with the President of the United States.  Bill Gates, who knows a thing or two, isn’t taking too kindly to President Trump’s budget blueprint, particularly the part about cutting foreign aid. Gates is of the very informed and highly researched opinion, that providing foreign aid not only assists the world’s poorest individuals, but it also helps Americans. A lot. Gates said as much in a recent TIME op-ed piece, explaining how foreign aid actually decreases global conflicts, strife and get this…political instability. There’s a joke in there somewhere, but I’ll leave you to make it. Feel free to leave it in the comments. In any case, Mr. Gates went on to say, “These projects [foreign aid] keep Americans safe. And by promoting health, security and economic opportunity, they stabilize vulnerable parts of the world.” I think the philanthropist billionaire/Microsoft co-founder just might be onto something, no?

Outta here…

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Image courtesy of Stuart Miles/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

As if a lawsuit from Google and claims of sexual harassment couldn’t make things any worse for Uber, things are about to get even more awkward – if that’s possible – with two very high-level execs saying buh-bye to the ride-hailing app. First we have President Jeff Jones, who is leaving after less than a year on the job. It seems that a few weeks ago, Uber CEO Travis Kalanick announced he was seeking new leadership, along with plans to install a new COO. Rumor has it that that bit might have had something to do with Jones untimely departure. In the meantime, Jones explained, in his own special spin that “…the beliefs and approach to leadership that have guided my career are inconsistent with what I saw and experienced at Uber, and I can no longer continue as president of the ride sharing business.” You just know there’s an ugly, yet presumably very juicy story behind that articulate statement. But I guess we’ll just have o wait for the book to come out. Naturally, Uber officially thanked Jones and wished “him all the best” no doubt with the utmost sincerity. The other Uber exit is brought to us by Brian McClendon, who is set to ditch his post of Vice President of Maps and Business Platforms. Mr. McClendon announced plans to return to his native Kansas to pursue a career in politics. He’s apparently very disenchanted with the state of Kansas’ fiscal crisis and presumably the rest of the political climate. At least that’s the story he’s sticking to.

Buy buy baby…

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Well, at least somebody has finally stepped up who has a bit of faith in Snap Inc. Enter James Cakmak, a Wall Street analyst with the firm Monness, Crespi, Hardt, who gave the app its very first – and only –  “buy” rating, slapping it with a $25 price target. And fyi, Snap identifies itself as a camera company. Got it? Having the dubious distinction of being crowned as the biggest tech IPO in two years, Snap managed to raise a whopping $3.4 billion its first day out. It went up almost 60% on its first day but since then came barreling back down over 25%. Its shares have been losing steam over concerns that the company has a ridiculously high valuation, yet grim prospects for profits. Cakmak graciously said that he’s giving Snap the benefit of the doubt because, even though he himself is unsure if Snap will be able to crank out an actual profit, he likes the way the company stacks up against its competitors. Awww.